Downward Facing Cow

Husband is home this morning. Kid wakes up. I get him out of bed and bring him in to snuggle with dad for a minute while I get my eyes (contacts) in and look presentable. Today this included a super comfy – and stylish – sweatshirt I’m loving (got on clearance at Kohl’s). Aaaand action!

Hubs: What is this thing you have on?
Me: It’s a sweatshirt. I’ve worn it before. You’ve seen it.
H: What’s all this mess? (flaps up the draping layers of my yoga-style cowl-neck sweatshirt).
M: It’s a cowl-neck. You’ve seen me wear this bef-
H: MOOOOOO!
M: No it’s a-
H: It looks like a backwards hoodie. Do you have this thing on right?
M: It’s a cowl-neck. C-O-W-L.
H: Oh like a cowl induction hood.
M: Mmm… okay. Kid, let’s go find you some breakfast.

The Greatest Show

It’s Oscar time! I’ve had a long day with the kid who won’t eat, so I’ve settled into the couch in sweats with my dinner in hand. That would be an orange cow, otherwise known as an ice cream float with orange soda. Yes, that’s my dinner. Come to think of it, I might top it off with some popcorn. It is a night at the movies after all.

The initial montage was fun. I like seeing Billy Crystal back at the helm. It just works. Already, Hugo is making its mark. Guess I’ll have to check that one out. Moving on, J Lo and Cameron Diaz are presenting the costume design and makeup awards and mentioned the line about a dress being tight enough to show you’re a woman but loose enough to show you’re a lady. One of them clearly wasn’t going along with that line, given that her girls appear to want to explode out the sparkly contraption “containing” them.

It’s not necessarily surprising, but I am glad to see that ‘A Separation’ (from Iran) won for Best Foreign Film. Again, I’ll have to see that. I should mention that I haven’t seen most of the films up for awards tonight. Another film I definitely want to see (and book to read) is The Help. Octavia Spencer was adorable during her acceptance speech for Best Supporting Actress.

The guys who won for Film Editing (Girl with the Dragon Tattoo) cracked me up with their speech – or lack thereof. And there goes Hugo again for Sound Editing. Everybody with that movie gives all the credit back to Scorcese. That man breathes and brilliant cinematography just happens. Cue Hugo again for Sound Mixing. According to various tweets, that’s 4/9 awards for Hugo thus far. Can you say sweeping?

The Cirque du Soleil feature was fantastically fun. It’s incredible what the human body can do with training and discipline. I would like to see any and all of the documentaries being nominated. I’m a nerd like that. When we had Netflix streaming, the hubs and I would get random documentaries and odd films. Freakonomics and Food, Inc. were two of interest that I can recall.

Doh! Dudes accepting for the Documentary (Undefeated) got the axe. And yet they kept talking as they were being ushered off the stage. Rango wins for animation. I’ve seen parts of that one. Does that count for anything?

Emma Stone looks stunning and yet super cute and hilarious. Well played, Jonah Hill with the rejection to dance on stage. Now you’re telling me Hugo won again?! I kind of thought with the end of an era, good old Harry Potter might take that one. Apparently so did many peeps on Twitter because the feed is blowing up.

Christopher Plummer set the bar high. He just won an Oscar at the ripe old age of 82, and his acceptance speech was phenomenal. That’s all there is to it. His wife who has been “suffering” for so long looks lovely and beaming with pride.

Penelope Cruz went for something different with this elegant, understated dress and necklace. I rather like it. Other fashionistas I’ve enjoyed thus far include Gwyneth Paltrow (she’s kind of a genius at this dressing for the occasion stuff), Octavia Spencer, Jessica Chastain – not a love at first sight for me but appreciate the attention to detail and fit, and during red carpet coverage Giuliana Rancic. Fabulous frock. Also George didn’t have to win because he already had a golden trophy. She nailed the look with simple hair and accessories.

How about that? The guy winning for Original Song (The Muppets) is from the Flight of the Concords. That’s funny. As was the presentation by Ferrell and GalafIcan’tspellhisname. Switching gears completely, Angelina is not that impressive tonight. The hair is just a blah mess, and she’s all dramatic like “Oooh, look at me, look at my leg slithering out of this grandiose black frock.” Pffft.

Yay for Saving Face winning for Documentary Feature. It’s great when a light can be shone on a story or message that impacts lives and can educate or gain support from people around the world. Again switching gears, I don’t know who some of these female presenters are. Is that bad?

Let’s talk about Meryl Streep. I love her. She’s brilliant. But this crazy gold, drapey number is not her best look. Ah well, you can’t win them all. On another note, the chick singing the memorial piece has a fro the size of a small nation and her voice is dreamy and ethereal. Well done.

Best Actor goes to Jean Dujardin for the Artist. Good for you, Francey-pants. Now I’d like to see that one. Best Acress – Meryl! What a way to go out. And The Artist takes the big one. Clearly I need to watch more movies. I’m always behind on these things because I’m too cheap to go to the theater very often and wait for stuff to go to Netflix and Redbox.

Overall, it was a good show. Some of Billy’s jokes fell flat, but I think that happens to some degree with any host.

What the Wednesday: Parking Wars

This edition of What the Wednesday is brought to you by crappy drivers, or more accurately crappy parkers. Tonight we headed out to dinner with the MIL, early because the hubs had a work meeting to attend at 7. So we show up to O’Charley’s just before 6 p.m. We drive around the whole building; there’s not a spot to be found. Seriously? Wow, they must be busy. We’re probably going to have to wait for a table.

I drive around again to let the MIL take the kid in and not have to hike a mile from wherever we could hope to park the car. That would be the lot for the next restaurant over, but hey it’s on the side and there are a fair amount of spots open. We go in and find the MIL and kid already have a table. There are empty tables. WTF?! Did everyone drive separately? The place isn’t full, but the lot is and then some. Oh well.

Dinner’s over. Hubs has left already for his meeting, and the MIL grabs the bag and leftovers and I grab the kid to head out. Walking toward the car, I see a shiny blue little coupe is parked within inches of the driver side of my car. Seriously? I’m smack in the middle of my spot. This car is practically on top of mine. Now which side do you think the kid’s seat is on? Of course! With the help of some Vaseline and the car door as far open as it can go (without just slamming it into the dingbat parking job), I squeeze Pumpkin in to his seat and shimmy into my door. That S#%& irks the bejeez out of me. And I’m assuming they were going to that restaurant alone because there’s no way a passenger could have gotten out of that mess.

It’s crap like this awesome parking job that causes me to dislike people in general. I’m somewhat cynical and jaded as it is. This stuff just makes me snarl a little more.

/end rant

Movie Night: True Grit

We’ve had a Netflix envelope sitting on our entertainment center for weeks now. This happens more often than I’d care to admit. We find ourselves with movies that are two hours or more and being the lame old people we are most nights have to convince ourselves we will stay awake to watch it after the little person goes to bed. Our usual routine = hubs passed out on couch by 9:45, snoring by 10, me writing/playing on my iPad or something like that until I realize it’s absurdly late at which point I get up, let the dog out, turn out the lights and nudge the lumberjack until he is aware it’s time to head up to bed.

So this time True Grit (the new one) has been sitting for weeks. It’s 1 hours 50 minutes long. Almost two hours worth of awesome acting. Seriously. Everyone in it is spot on, with Jeff Bridges and Hailee Steinfeld giving fantastic performances. Sure the drama and action are great, but who knew a classic western could have so many great quips and one-liners too?

Bottom line: Regardless of your attitude towards westerns, you should take the time to watch film.

Guilty Pleasure: DW & Psycho Horseface Model

Where do I begin tonight? I’m coming out of the trashy reality TV closet. Don’t tell anyone, but here goes… I watch the Bachelor. (EEEE, AAAAAGH, WTF?, NOOOO!) But wait, let me explain. Have you ever tried to watch this stuff? I have issues with reality TV like:

  • There’s entirely too much of it. What percentage of programming is some kind of reality contest/race/dating show/fight to the death/failed contestants returning to try again at racing/surviving/dating? Redonculous.
  • Let’s be honest. It’s not really REAL.
  • People somehow become “celebrities” from appearing on such things and make money just for looking like an idiot on TV?
  • Particular to the Bachelor/Bachelorette, I’m sure anyone can feel all lovey-dovey (read: lust) when they’re being flown all over the friggin’ world and taken out on “dates” that average Americans only dream of checking off their bucket list.

So you see why this is a problem for me. Here’s the thing. I don’t know why after catching a bit of the first episode this season, I didn’t just turn the channel. No, no, instead I happened to be blogging/skimming Twitter at the same time and found interesting tweets about the show. After a few episodes in conjunction with my Twitter feed set to search for “bachelor” I. was. hooked. This stuff is pure comedy, people!

We already know that so much of this is fake, a joke, and for many contestants just a way to get their name out there, promote their brand or get “found” in the Hollywood industry. Spoiler alert: If you didn’t know that and you really believe dude here is trying to find true love, you might want to have your head checked or just check the success rate for marriages from all seasons of this show. Yeah.

All that aside, I watch it with Twitter *that’s key!* because I’m pretty much guaranteed to be cracking up for a few hours on Monday nights. Of course there are the typical, “Dude’s hair is awful. It keeps getting worse” type tweets. True. It was quite wretched tonight. And to quote a tweet, “He looks like DW from Arthur!”

Yup. Then there are the, “Courtney is a crazy b#$%^!” tweets. Also true. The rest are a broad spectrum of hilarity. Like – watching with my Grandma. She says, “He needs a hair net!” to “That bi$%# stole those vows from Carrie Bradshaw and SATC!” Then there’s, “If I created a drinking game where you took a shot every time someone on the bachelor said ‘I’m here for the right reasons’…” and “If Ben says ‘vulnerable’ one more time I’m switching the channel.” It gets better and better, sometimes more vulgar, and bust-a-gut funny and better.

If you’ve never seen it or don’t intend to watch it, the following video pretty much sums it up.

And for all you impatient people like me, if you simply must know who he picks, you can read the spoiler here. Even with that knowledge, I still watch because, like I said – HILARIOUS.

Let me know what you think if you try the viewing/Twitter experience.

Stream of Consciousness Sunday: Itchy Head

SOC Sunday

I have a serious headache. I’ve had it all day. It’s one of those if I could slice off about 1/3 of my head, I would. One of those ones I woke up with (as often occurs), but “It’s only a dull pain, so I’m sure once I have some coffee it’ll bail” type of headaches. Only it didn’t. I took a nap with it; I’ve played with the kid with it, ran to Kohl’s with it (almost forgot to use my Kohl’s Cash! I always let that crap expire, ugh), made dinner with it and helped the no-eating monster see that chicken, broccoli and potatoes are not his archenemies.
It was in that single minute, sitting at the dining room table after we’re all stuffed and the kid has been freed from his cage (highchair), that my head hurts that much worse and I’m subconsciously rubbing my head in various spots and purposefully pulling my hair. Okay, I partially only realize this because my husband is watching me and says, “Itchy?” Me- “Wha? Oh, no, it hurts. Still.” I finally cave and take something.
I’ve never been officially diagnosed with migraines because I haven’t had an MRI or stuck with one general physician long enough to have an in-depth discussion about this. Because I’m stubborn. And it goes in spurts. And I try my darnedest to ignore pain. It did get bad enough at one point that I started documenting when they happened, maybe for sake of discussion with doc and trying to pinpoint a “trigger”? But did I use that info? No. Cause they stopped happening nearly so much. But now and then… they kill me. To the point I want to take my contacts out, close my eyes, and cover my head with a dark blanket because it just can’t get dark and quiet enough.

This was my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

  • Set a timer and write for 5 minutes.
  • Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
  • Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
  • Visit all.things.fadra to add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
  • Link up your post to that days SOC Sunday post.
  • Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

Catching Up/Major Trauma

I feel like I can’t not post because I’ve missed a few already, but tonight I was busy catching Pumpkin up on his progress in the journal I keep for him. Considering the last time I wrote was the end of November (!), I had a lot to say. I mean, c’mon. In that time he has dropped the love affair with food, gained an excitement for walking and started developing a silly, sweet little personality all his own. We’ve experienced HFM (hand, foot and mouth disease) – during Christmas no less, taken some trips and had two haircuts.

The second haircut just happened to take place this morning, and it. was. bad. It started okay, a few whimpers here and there, but I kept the raisins coming and he munched along and looked around at the other ladies. But then… she got the clippers out, started above one ear and the tears just rolled. I don’t know what happened, because he did fine through the whole process last time. It was traumatic to say the least.

At least his dad is happy. He’s been complaining for a month now that our son looks like some kind of Bieber/heathen/hippy. Oy.